Operation Bye Bye Chubby Girl
First off let me say I am NO EXPERT. Just your average woman struggling with her weight. I want people to know if I can do it, they CAN do it.
As so many people do every year I made a resolution to lose weight.... Even more specific get down to my prepregnancy weight before my first born! So operation bye bye chubby girl fell underway. It is VERY hard for me to go public with my weight but in doing so I hope to inspire others and not only that but keep myself motivated as I share my journey. I have to succeed, not only to look better but in order to get my health back on track and my life. Failure is not an option this time...at least I hope not....
Let me give you a little backround on myself. For starters I am only 22 and let me tell you being 22 and obese hurts...bad. In high school I was the cheerleader and gymnast. Built “like a brick shit house", as my grandmother always said. At my heaviest I weighed around 135 (and to think I thought I was fat then).....far from my wopping 213....... but at age 18 my battle with weight loss began. At age 18 my now husband and I became pregnant with our first born and I gained over 60 pounds!!! As result I ballooned to 216 pounds, and my weight lose battle begun. I managed to lose some and got down to 186 lbs... but still had a loooonnnggg way to go... Soon excersise and eating healthy became a thing of the past... I felt horrible... I looked horrible...I began to let myself go...I think that is where my depression began...I quit caring....My husband said he still loved me and I was still "hot" to him so the hell with make-up, cute clothes, and excersise...Bring on the sweats and chocolate...but was I really happy? Not AT ALL! I quit weighing my self and avoided mirrors as much as possible...How on earth could my husband stand to look at this body when I could not? Who wanted a wife with stretch marks and jello? (I now think of those stretch marks as story lines to a beautiful preganacy and birth of my son, and I have become more comfortable with them.) But I was not comfortable with the rest..not at all...As the next 2 years went on my weight went up and down up and down from 169 - 193 lbs.... After 2 years I became pregnant with my second son... The worst of my weight gain was about to begin... With this pregnancy I gained ANOTHER 30 lbs and ended at 216 lbs. I was determined to lose it! Well so I thought... I left the hospital and imediatly began a diet, a unhealthy diet, I became tired, drained, and depressed. I managed to lose 30 lbs. but still was not happy and the process began alllll over again.. I started to eat because I was depressed and the cycle started all over.... I gained and gained... So around Dec. I decided 2012 would be the year... The year I get my life under control....I had to....my health was now in danger...and my realtionships with everyone around me. So here I am my weight lose journey begins at 213 lbs. (Just 3 pounds less that my weight at the birth of my second son.... How depressing.)
So what is my goal? First off I want to reach my goal weight of 135.. To be able to fit in all those jeans hid in the back of my closet...and to inspire someone to do the same, but then there are all the small things like... my husband being able to pick my up again and swing my around...to sit on his lap without the fear of breaking his leg haha....to keep up with my kids....to not be out of breath walking up stairs... to feel good in my own skin...to not feel the need to cover my self up all the time...and so many other small things that the skinny girl inside me misses.
